Tutorial for a rainy day.

 We had the most unbelievable thunderstorm here a few days ago. The bright morning sky suddenly disappeared and within moments the rain descended, and the banging and crashing started. At one point a clap of thunder went off directly overhead, so loud that it hurt my ears and set car alarms in the area off!

The cats were freaking out and so I decided that it was time to put on some music and relax with some sewing. I thought I would share this little tutorial with you to help with your sewing on rainy days.

How to sew whilst entertaining a 12 week old kitten.

You will need:

1 pattern of your choosing, and the requisite fabric, notions etc.
4-35 ping pong balls, depending on availability
2 lengths of string
1 pack of plasters
1 tube of antiseptic
Stain remover
1 teapot, mug and teabags (milk and sugar if desired.)
1 large chocolate bar

Begin by waiting until the kitten is safely asleep, then frantically lay out your pattern, cut and then pin to the fabric. If you're lucky you might manage at least five minutes of this before the kitten wakes up and realises they are missing out on all the fun.

This is where you need your ping pong balls on hand. Each time the little kitty makes a chase for the scissors, or the pins, or attempts to skid around on your carefully laid pattern, reach for your stash of ping pong balls. The trick is to distract the kitten at key moments by chucking a ball into the other room.

Keep this up for as many balls as you have. Experience denotes that you will gain about 3.6 seconds using this technique, so cut fast!

Now you've managed to cobble together the piece of the pattern it's time to begin sewing up. Here is where you need the string. You will be using this to try and keep the kitten away from the bobbin, thread, and moving fabric as you sew. This is where you will learn the essential "sewing one handed" technique, which is guaranteed to change the way you sew forever.

The final stage is when you begin to do the complicated points of the pattern, such as setting in the sleeves, or pinning the bodice to the skirt. Chances are by now you've used up all your ping pong balls, string and other diversionary tactics, so the kitten will manage to pounce on your bare foot to chew your toe, just as you are placing a pin.

This will repeat itself indefinitely no matter how firmly you scold the cat.

Finally, place antiseptic and plasters on wounded toes (from the cat) and fingers (from the pins jabbed into them as the cat feasted on your toes), place stain remover on the blood splatters on your project, and then decide it's not worth washing and place in the bin.

Retreat to the sofa with a large cup of tea and chocolate bar, just in time to watch the kitten smugly fall asleep in a pile of off cuts and pattern pieces next to the sewing machine.

I hope this has been helpful to all those out there who might consider naively sewing and kittens a nice mix on a rainy autumn day!